Am I the only female addict on here ?

[Mel]

Well I knew that I had an unhealthy relationship with sex for a long time but only when I was single, I met and fell in love with an amazing guy albeit we met at a swingers club, apparently his first time and he had never done anything like it before after splitting from his wife, fast forward nearly five years and a monogamous relationship we get married and within 6 weeks im feeling unloved and so totally and utterly depressed I find myself back on familiar ground and sleeping with someone. My husband has found out and ended he marriage ! How and why after all this time did I slip back into this place ?

needless to say I've destroyed him and my kids and he wants nothing more to do with me and I'm heartbroken at what I've done 

[Christine]

Mel, I am sorry to hear that you have found yourself in this situation, but their is hope. The reason you find yourself in this situation might be to do with how you manage your emotions and the expectation of being married and feeling unloved sounds like this was too much for you and your response was to self soothe in your addiction. Dealing with emotions and the underlying emotional pain of why you self soothe in this way is key. You might want to consider having therapy or attending to address this. What has happened cannot be undone but it does not have to mean total destruction. Christine

[Mel]

Right now I’m back in the emotional
Zone think I must be due on but in the upset and angry zone, why didn’t he want to move home his career so important, he wouldn’t have even considered this career had I not pushed him and forced him to believe in himself, a job he hates, people he doesn’t like or respect who don’t show him any respect in turn, he says he feels undervalued and unhappy yet doesn’t want to move home to help me when I was at breaking point, regardless of my views on his weight when we met we got married for feek sake was that not enough for him to show me some intimacy ? Is it any wonder I didn’t feel wanted or loved 

Edited September 20, 2017 by Mel

[Mel]

Got first session with relationship counselling booked alone for next week got sla meeting tomorrow night and my appointment with community psychiatric team in two weeks can’t comw quick enough 

[Christine]

Hope the support your getting works out for you and that you receive the specialist treatment for sex addiction in a way that helps you and your relationship. Brave decisions and they show that you really want change.