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I was more prepared for the first lockdown, but this time it’s hit me like a train. It is all so depressing not helped with the US elections!

Speaking to others I have found they are feeling depressed too and as we know as PA and SA we are more easily triggered at this time.

I felt no one cares about me! I’m a Sex Addict! So for over a year since a slip and many years since relapse I was starting to think about it!!!

Luckily I remembered that I am loved by my partner, friends, people on this forum who would be very sad if had slipped.

So I read again “Trick or Treat”

 https://thelaurelcentre.co.uk/blog/is-your-brain-tricking-you-into-having-a-treat

The reason for writing is to flag up what Covid is doing in our lives at this time, watch out and stay safe.

Firefly

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Dear Firefly, thank you so much for being honest about how hard this lockdown has hit you.   Well done in not taking those thoughts further and that you were able to ground yourself in the love that surrounds you.  I am glad the blog helped too.   Keep safe.  Ginny

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Hi Firefly,

I’m so sorry that you have struggled in this lockdown, you have given me, amongst others,   strength, and your story has helped me make some sense of  my husbands addiction.  I’m pleased for you and your family that you took control. 
Due to our circumstances my husband left our home suddenly and has been living away for nearly 15 months now. He has no support network and is focusing on work and therapy only and living a very simple life.  We talk occasionally, it’s always difficult, and I do occasionally ask him if he has relapsed or thought of it, and he says not. I can’t quite understand that, I know the shock of arrest was a major wake up call, but wonder if as an addict it can be that simple. I just don’t know whether to believe him. He seems to be putting his ‘old life’ as the triggers. This worries me as how will he ever live a ‘normal’ life with ‘normal’ relationships again. I doubt we will ever be back together again, as a couple, but I want him to well and safe and happy.

 

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Hi Tabs. Thanks for your kind words. At this moment, although it has been 15 months, I think your husband may still be in shock, so I can believe that he has focused all his attention on work.  I am glad he is getting therapy and hope that will address the painful memories, cognitive distortions that led to his self soothing acting out. 

I hope you are still getting some comfort from this Forum at this very difficult time for you.

Best wishes,

Graham

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