Burger

I did add the text below as an answer to another thread, but thought I would start my own as well. I've been married for 14 years and I have always looked at porn, but over the last 2 years it has become steadily deeper - I've been suffering with depression and anxiety (for which I have got help for), I was viewing anything that was available, chatting in chat rooms, and, what I am most ashamed about, getting someone over to my house, we were looking at porn together while masterbating... and I my wife came home and disturbed us... I really don't know where it would have gone if she hadn't! I realise now that this is an addiction (which I had been denying), and I hadn't spoken about it to my therapist or anyone else! I really wish I had! I thought I was "back to normal", but still had this secret life which was very likely to progress even deeper! I had been filling a void in my life with porn and chatrooms... a void that wasn't there - which I would have seen if I had been giving as much attention to my wife and kids as I was to porn and people in chatrooms. The trust my wife had in me has now gone, but she does understand that I have a problem and that I want and need to address it. I've gone from feelings of total dispare and wanting to kill myself, to feelings of hope that I might be able to get better. It's early days, together we have blocked all adult content on any web access I have, and I have contacted my Doctor who has referred me to see a proper psychaitrist now (rather than a therapist), which I hope to see ASAP. I have sworn to my wife that I want to get better, and I will do anything I possible can too rebuild that trust. Burger!

Hi Simon, I'm in a very similar position as you... I have always looked at porn, but over the last 2 years it has become steadily deeper - I've been suffering with depression and anxiety (for which I have got help for), I was viewing anything that was available, chatting in chat rooms, and, what I am most ashamed about, getting someone over to my house, we were looking at porn together while masterbating... and I my wife came home and disturbed us... I really don't know where it would have gone if she hadn't! I realise now that this is an addiction (which I had been denying), and I hadn't spoken about it to my therapist or anyone else! I really wish I had! I thought I was "back to normal", but still had this secret life which was very likely to progress even deeper! I had been filling a void in my life with porn and chatrooms... a void that wasn't there - which I would have seen if I had been giving as much attention to my wife and kids as I was to porn and people in chatrooms. The trust my wife had in me has now gone, but she does understand that I have a problem and that I want and need to address it. I've gone from feelings of total dispare and wanting to kill myself, to feelings of hope that I might be able to get better. It's early days, together we have blocked all adult content on any web access I have, and I have contacted my Doctor who has referred me to see a proper psychaitrist now (rather than a therapist), which I hope to see ASAP. I have sworn to my wife that I want to get better, and I will do anything I possible can too rebuild that trust. Burger!