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tutonofap last won the day on December 11

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  1. tutonofap

    Husband addicted to cstfishing

    Hi Distraught81! and members... Well this seems to be a really hard thing for anyone to go thru it, so first of all I wish you are fine and remember that your children needs you a lot right now, also you need take care of you so not to loose the control. For security reasons I will recommend that ask your husband to move to other place, he could become anger and agressive so you or your children could be in any kind of risk, so ask for professional help in order to know how to proceed, and you have to be fastest as you can to protect yourself and your children. About your divorce it is not important what anyone else thinks about it... The more dangerous emotions related to sex addiction are shame and fear, so you have to move far away of them. Maybe you can call to any official phone service to ask for phiscological assistance over the phone, trust your gut, it will never fail... Do whatever you do, remember: This is not about yourself, this is his struggle and sometimes you have to move away and let him to resolve it alone. We are here to support you so write whatever you feel, break your fear, break your silence, break your shame and take your life back. A great hug for you!
  2. tutonofap

    Any online support group for partners?

    Hi Kate! I hope you are very well! This are some online forums you can write in: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php / http://www.rebootnation.org/forum/index.php / https://yourbrainrebalanced.com/ ll they have sections for partners. I also recommend you the book "Porn Addict's Wife" by Sandy Brown https://amzn.to/2QqVrkA it has a lot to know about this matter and for your husband this is a very good book "Porn Addiction Cure" by Matt Peplinski https://amzn.to/2PaHgeP it is one of the better books I had found, it also has an online course you can buy with this coupon https://www.udemy.com/sexual-addiction-recovery/?couponCode=BOOKOWNER1 for $9.99 and get the book for free when you are in the course. I imagine you already know about yourbrainonporn.com by Gary Wilson. The book of Sandy Brown would be a great resource for you I hope!
  3. tutonofap

    Multiple cross addiction? Any hope?

    I was addicted to marihuana for 14 years, to alcohol for some other years and to porn for almost 26 years (since I had ten) so I can tell you that multiple addictions are common, maybe not usual, but well some of we had been addicted wothout know about it... For me my life was normal as all my friends are addicted too, so 1 year ago I had told you that I was a happy normal person, so maybe your husband is someone like me, work in yourself, and let him work on himself, keep with him until you can, start talking with love, and try to understand where his addictions live so he can understand what is going on.... As Christine told you this is his live and he has to work on his therapy for himself first... Take care on you, and support him as much as you can, but don´t leave this that ruin your life as well, go a step by step, one day at a time, love for you and for him. You will win this fight!
  4. tutonofap

    Restarted masturbation

    Kate 2018 Thank you so much for your support, is so valuable for me, I had relapsed some times this past week, with PMO so I'm restarting on Hard Mode again, I'm on my 5° day again, the urges had been so hard and difficult to control, but I feel so well because I'm going again, it is hard but it is achievable, so I will go again... I do a lot of things to control the urges, also I lost my wife for my addiction so I'm alonte on this with this, I have some friends that are supporting me, but anyway this is a problem I have to win alone, nobody excepts me can do nothing, so I will win my 90 days on sobriety this time. I really appreciate your help! You are a great person, please never leave alone to your husband, give him your support as you are doing, this is the worse addiction I had fought with, recovery is not easy, but is achievable, so you husband is very, very lucky having you there, what you do is a great action of love and compassion. If any time you want to ask me something or just talk about this, please feel free to contact me, would be a pleasure to talk and share whatever you want to know in order to support your husband... So let's keep going with this!
  5. Hi friends! I had being trying to recover alone so I have not money to pay for a professional treatment and also there is not a 12 step program near my city, so I'm doing what I can, my longest streak was 62 days on hard mode (no sex, orgasm, ejaculation, porn or masturbation) after that time I started to feel very depressed and frustrated, so I decided to give a try to conscious masturbation (masturbation with no porn, fantasies, or any other stimuli, just physical sensations) so in november I had just masturbated two times with conscious masturbation to orgasm) but Im trying to reach 90 days in hard mode again, but I had a hard time passing from 10 days, basically every 10 days I had masturbated, so its very fine, there is no porn, no false stimuli, just physical sensations, but I'm afraid of a more serious relapse, I found that masturbation is one of my hardest addictions. So what can I do to start abstaining again? Usually I feel fine, but I had just did a masturbation some hour ago and now I'm feeling bad and guilty. Thank you for your help and time