Jump to content

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'porn addict'.

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


Forums

  • General
    • Sex & Porn Addiction
    • Success Stories
    • Partner Concerns
    • Off-Topic Discussion

Calendars

  • Community Calendar

Find results in...

Find results that contain...


Date Created

  • Start

    End


Last Updated

  • Start

    End


Filter by number of...

Joined

  • Start

    End


Group


Found 4 results

  1. Hi there, I've been on these forums for a while now. Relating with so many of you but struggling to put my own words and feelings into writing this so this will probably be a very scattered mixed bag of thoughts and feelings.... It's hard to even rearrange and organise what's worth/more important to share and seek support with others about since it's so much. Our story is short since we've only been together for 2 years but we're already facing issues most of you have years in of marriage .. We're a a young couple in our mid 20's. Long distance relationship (different continents). He's my first serious true love & relationship where we're both sure we're each others "the one" so it's been great, serious and heartbreaking at the same time. I'm gonna skip to last year when shit started hitting the fan. I caught him cheating w an ex, sexting and planning to meet up (but never did according to him, i believe him), sexted some other random girl, being generally shady with his socials etc, found out about his porn addiction in this tornado and it's basically been heaven & hell for almost a year now. Heaven when it felt like we've reconnected and felt more in love than ever, and hell.. well you guys can imagine that part. He's been serious about recovering for the first time it feels like after I recently discovered he's been relapsing multiple times when i caught him going into chat rooms, specific instagram girls and watching porn... while I was in the other room. He's attended a few SLAA meetings, started reading books and booking an appointment with a therapist specialised in porn addiction. But how am I supposed to think it's gonna work this time AGAIN. This man has seen me broken, in so many ways. I know he loves me like no other but he's lied straight to my face about things I've already known the truth about so many times. A LOT of traumatic drip drip disclosure and awful fights where he sometimes just shuts me off and pushes me away when we're away from each other which is extra stressful since i can never be sure about what he's up to. Which sometimes is nice but ignorance is only bliss for so long.. Our fights have been a reason for him to relapse too. My stress levels are just up the roof when i spiral, i literally feel like i'm having heart attack sometimes just thinking if he's hiding / lying to me or not. How will I ever know the truth without dragging my heart and soul through what feels like a million daggers? How will I know when he relapses? It feels like he's just gonna find new ways to hide and delete his tracks. How do you set new boundaries in a relationship since the ones you thought were completely unacceptable to break has been broken and you're still here..? I've done my best to educate myself about a before completely unknown territory for me, staying out of his hair at the same time as getting to learn about his addiction and showing my unconditional support, but I just don't know how much pain I should take? I already know I can take a lot but how much is too much? How do you set your limits when the ones you thought you had has already been reached and passed long time ago? Appreciate if you read this far, i'm so lost as you can tell haha..
  2. Hi I am a recovering sex addict a very very long way to go for me but I am on track. Will anyone be interested to know/work with me to recover on the sexual addictive behavior. Thanks (You help me more than I help you by me sharing the message that I have freely received)
  3. I really feel ill 🥺 his presence in the house is ruining my relationship & time with our 8yr old. As the accomplishment actor & liar he is... my husband can act like things are ok. He can compartmentalise and laugh & joke with little one while I’m sat catatonic & broken on the sofa. It’s his day off so there is no respite from his presence. I can’t bring myself to tell little one anything, he thinks Dads in the box room because of his snoring. He sees I’m not ok but I’ll just seem like the miserable cow while dad’s laughing & joking & it infuriates me because this is not my fault. I didn’t ask for any of this. I became the queen of trauma recovery work after those first two times years ago. I put a metric shit tonne of work in to try to claw back our little family & he’s done this to me & is again. I just want what I thought was real back 😭🤯🤬😭 I can’t stop crying. I really want my mum & I feel so small like a child. I’m really really hurting & the one one person I count on is the person who’s done this to me. I’ve nobody to hold me & comfort me.
  4. Hi everyone I'm new here. So sorry for the long post in advance! I have recently found out that my husband is a possible porn/sex addict. We have been together for 22 years, since high school. Not sure where to start but here goes. I was 14 when we met he was 17 he seemed to head over heels and has always made out that he is crazy about me hes very quiet and seemed very sensitive. When we would be out and about in our early days I used to notice how much he was ogling women, I did explain that I felt this was disrespectful and that he should not do it it hurt my feelings. I had been a model in my later teens so thought I was attractive enough to keep his attention obviously not, he actually use to tell me regularly I was crazy he said would never do that to you what do you take me for as if I love you etc. Stupidly and blinded by love I believed him or wanted to and decided it was jealousy on my part so pushed it aside I've seen him since but ignored it until recently. We just returned from a family holiday in a villa my brother in law brought his new girlfriend and her daughter of 17 she's same age as our daughter, my husband was wholly and completely distracted by the girl and hardly spoke to me all week the girl appeared to be flirting and enjoyed the attention as teenagers sometimes do so it was pretty awful he was constantly focused on her. I wanted to come home, half way through the week I told him to stop it it was wrong keep ogling the young girl he's nearly 40 and made me feel worthless and she's the same age as our daughter, he swore on our kids lives he wasnt but he's later confessed that he was and was having sexual thoughts it's like a knife in my chest. During the holiday he did something very random unlike him he walked into the shower whilst I was showering and started foreplay I was shocked I told him to stop he ws upset by this. I believe he was checking out the girl again and following his fantasy it makes me feel sick. our sex life was amazing in the most part but odd times he would be rough pulling my hair or positions he's never wanted to try. Then sometimes he'd have no interest at all. Although around the time my gut feeling was nagging me a couple of years ago he started trying it on whilst I was asleep and times I'd let him once awoken be living he really wanted me this went on for over a year more or less every night and suddenly stopped I'm not sure if this is common or not or has anything to do with this. However since returning home I have had a funny feeling a feeling that really has been off and on for some time you see I smelt perfume on him and there were nights he'd go out drinking and not come home work away etc. I started going through laptop after hols and found loads of nude pics porn 4 dating sites etc. He denied it all then finally admitted it that he oggles women all the time and the girl on holiday problem is we have to see them it's his brothers girlfriends daughter who will be attending family events. He admitted he watches porn daily always has since teenage years sometimes he watches more sometimes not but times after we have sex, but says he never chatted or met up with women, quite frankly after 22 years of deceit and making me think I'm mad I don't believe him I believe my instinct and I am positive something has gone on with other women at some point, there's pictures on the data files on laptop that look like everyday women in bras skimpy clothes. They all seem to be dark haired I'm blonde that also makes me wonder if I was really what he wanted my confidence is shattered probably lower than I have ever felt in my life I'm totally heartbroken I've lost over a stone in 3 weeks. have got a therapist for myself starts next week. Also Google maps time line places him at an address regularly I found out its a single women's house appears he's been there on at least 40 occasions but he still denies it I know maps can be off at times but surely not so much everything else is right and he agreed all other timelines were correct . Now and then I get snippets of more lies I keep catching him out. There's so much he's hidden at one point had 3 mobiles but until now I never questioned him I trusted him with my life I know that sounds silly why 3 phones/ different numbers he's an engineer and one is work one privatel one was broke he said but I don't think it was and I've now got the sd card and phone records. In the last few weeks things have been manic my husband seems almost lost I'm either angry or crying or stressing searching for more evidence I can't sleep etc. He's the love of my life and Im devastated. He is going to see a sex therapist on Saturday I'm going for the first appointment this is good. However he seems ashamed he has told me how sorry he is and that he never meant to cause any pain he loves me and has never had sex with anyone else, but his actions seem unlike a person who is remorseful I mean he's still not communicating with me hardly he also tried to blame me after an argument the other day, I told him straight this is his addiction and not my problem. I also found out he's had a gambling problem really bad for 8 years again he lied to me until confronted with bank statements. Sorry to go on but any support from fellow members would be appreciated it's difficult to talk to anyone who I'm close with as this is so personal I don't want others to know details. Thanks in advance x
×
×
  • Create New...