A few months ago my boyfriend of a year and a half admitted to cheating on me. We got together when we were 16 and had a really loving relationship (well thats what I thought), we were serious and everyone was completely shocked that he cheated as it was something so out of character for him. I broke up with him but he still wants to be together, I don't know what to do. As weeks went by, more and more things were being revealed, he cheated on me multiple times, not just physically but by sending nude photos, flirting with girls, having files of over 1000 photos of girls we knew without their consent that he would use to masturbate to. I knew he watched porn but but I did not realise how immoral and indecent the type of things he would watch and how frequent it was. We had previously had a period of time where he seemed completely disinterested in me and he now admits that he was having romantic feelings for another person which he tried to pursue while we were together. He came to the conclusion that he was a porn, sex and love addict. He had this type of behaviour for years before we even knew eachother. He says he used the porn and photos of girls as a way to cope with his depression. He wants to change and has been partaking in the online community NoFap and will start seeing a psychosexual counsellor soon.
Right now I'm waiting for a specialist for their opinion on whether or not he is an addict because at least that way I would have some closure. Hes dealt with severe mental health issues for years, throughout his adolescene. I have remained friends with him as I deeply care for him and love him. But it is also largely due to the fact after the breakup his mental health plummeted and he is still struggling with feelings of suicide after several attempts. This time has been really intense but he is being put into counselling for his depression and I've been receiving counselling myself too.
Hes fully aware about how I feel. I love him but I am not in a place to have a relationship at all let alone him. I know I could find someone else, even being single now I have had casual encounters with people. But despite everything I love him so much. Maybe I'm being young and stupid but I thought I was going to marry this guy. We will both be moving away to go to university (not sure where yet) in Autumn this year and I have tried to explain to him how we are so young and have so many opportunities ahead of us to meet someone else. But hes convinced that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. I tell him how unrealistic that is but he just tells me its what he want. So really, when I'm ready and he's recovering, do I try again? Is it worth it? Another complication is that after all this I'm refusing to be long distance. I wish someone would just give me their honest opinion and advice. Please help