Hi Kitty, Thank you for posting on the Forum, I know it takes courage to reach out and let others know what you're experiencing and I'm sorry to read what a hard time you're having right now. The questions you're asking yourself are very understandable and most partners in your situation ask themselves the same questions. It sounds like you're reading, of have read Paula's Partners Perspective book and I hope that has been helpful. Many partners find having their own counselling to support them through this difficult time very helpful, preferably with someone trained and experienced in supporting partners of Sex Addicts. If that was something you felt would be useful, one place you could start to look for a suitable counsellor is the ATSAC (the Association for the Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity) website: http://www.atsac.co.uk/out-of-control-sexual-behaviour There is also a support group for the Partners of Sex Addicts that I know many have found very supportive and useful.: http://www.cosa-recovery.org/states/UnitedKingdom.html Best Wishes Gabriel.