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psh

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About psh

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  1. Just spent £150 on porn and am really angry and unhappy. I'm in my late 30's married and I have almost no interest sexually in my partner although I love her to bits, I use porn when I'm stressed and bored and have never really seen it as an issue or a problem. Recently started to see the links between general unhappiness and the use of pornography further research made the link between pornography and the inability to concentrate (don't know whether this is true or not) . But pornography and computer game use have always been constants throughout my life since I was 18+ and I feel that this has been related to my ability to complete course work at college and university, my lack of employment for many years and now is having an impact on my employment. Staying up late, being very stressed has been a constant companion in my life. I'm hoping that giving up porn will address some of these issues. I do feel as though I have a difficulty in making connections with people and I don't know whether this is because of porn, but I now feel lonelier then I ever have and am not confident in social interaction very easy despite having what some would consider a job that requires such confidence. When I was much younger I cross-dressed and this is also led to interest in Sissy and cross dressing porn, and into sexual behaviors that unrelated to my sexual preference. I don't identify myself as TV Bisexual or Gay. I don't know what to do, I've recently read a book about a 12 step program by a famous celebrity, and have found a local 12 step group. However I'm not very spiritual, consider myself an atheist and am not sure that this is for me. I just want some direction.
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